I imagine that if you were to do some quick research on this topic of passive-aggressive behavior, you would be startled to discover . . . YOU are passive-aggressive.

Here’s the textbook definition:

pas·sive-ag·gres·sive (p?s’?v-?-gr?s’?v)
adj. Of, relating to, or having a personality disorder characterized by habitual passive resistance to demands for adequate performance in occupational or social situations, as by procrastination, stubbornness, sullenness, and inefficiency.

The thing is . . . if you look at the definition a certain way, it could describe anybody. Would you guys classify me as passive-aggressive? My wife classifies me as passive-passive.

Here’s the thing, though. I would say I am passive-aggressive to certain people. In particular, people with whom I clearly have a strained relationship. Why? Well, as a Christian you’re thinking to yourself that although you may not like each other, you should strive to be nice to them, right? I don’t know. To some degree, there has to be hypocrisy in that.

I would like to think that people can share their negative opinions with me. I would like for people to be transparent with me. You don’t like something I said or you don’t like something I did or you don’t like the way I do things, then say so. Why hide it when I can clearly tell that you have issues with me? The disdain is written all over your face. Your silence just makes things awkward. Would you believe me if I said I have a pretty good sense of a person’s general feelings toward me whether they be positive or negative? I am a pretty good judge of character.

Anyways, I think church could be so different if it was okay to tell the truth instead of making sure everyone’s happy and comfortable . . .


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